| I tend to request constructive feedback on many | | | | to defend our selves or our actions. |
| different things knowing there will be times I'll arc up at | | | | On the other side of the coin it also takes true |
| what I hear or read. I've requested website reviews | | | | courage to give good, constructive feedback for fear |
| for months now and finally a website critiqued mine. | | | | of a negative response or reprisal, even if the |
| The first lines were about the great content, author is | | | | feedback was requested. |
| a great writer AND then line after line of feedback... | | | | Below are 10 straightforward tips for coping with |
| After the initial nervous breakdown, banging head on | | | | feedback: |
| keyboard and brick wall (I suggest you restrain | | | | Work on the attitude of feedback is fun, enlightening |
| yourself from doing this - it hurts and leaves funny | | | | and a great learning tool as opposed to feedback is |
| indentations in your forehead!) and sheer indignation of | | | | scary and to be avoided at all costs. |
| how could 'they' (whoever they are) think that? I | | | | Feedback is someone else's opinion however there |
| calmed down and started dissecting each piece of | | | | may be an element of truth in there even if the size of |
| information carefully. | | | | an atom. |
| Only the other day a very experienced IT professional | | | | Consider the experience level of the person giving |
| friend of mine rang me to say my website had lots of | | | | feedback (did you really ask your partner for |
| meat but no sizzle. Well wasn't that great news? | | | | feedback?). |
| Although this was constructive feedback, it still | | | | Allow the other person to complete what they're |
| managed to take the wind out of my sails for a short | | | | saying; wait at least 3 seconds before responding as |
| while. | | | | opposed to reacting. |
| I've since taken this feedback onboard and am tossing | | | | Centre and balance yourself by taking several slow |
| around a few ideas here and there so I can give my | | | | deep breaths before the feedback discussion takes |
| website that much needed zazazoom it's meant to | | | | place. |
| have! | | | | Never take it personally. |
| In the past I've also requested feedback when job | | | | Employ the attitude that this is a learning experience, |
| applications have been unsuccessful so I can learn to | | | | learn what you can from it, even if it means you've |
| do better next time. | | | | learned how not to give feedback. |
| Sometimes people will ask for feedback when what | | | | Be totally in the present moment. It's the best place to |
| they're really after is approval, especially when we | | | | be for paying attention. |
| think we're doing a great job. When they hear what | | | | Remember the reason you wanted this feedback. |
| they'd rather not they go out and kick the cat, dog, or | | | | Finally, thank the person for their feedback (even |
| punching bag, whatever is handy, have a few drinks, or | | | | though privately you may not agree with it). The fact |
| telephone all their friends. | | | | they gave it to you gives you the option of choosing to |
| "No one can make you feel inferior without your | | | | act on it, consider it or simply just ignore it. |
| consent." | | | | Receiving constructive feedback needn't be an anxiety |
| Eleanor Roosevelt (1884-1962) | | | | filled experience. Having the attitude that feedback is a |
| To receive honest, constructive feedback is much like | | | | gift in disguise may be what will enable you to move |
| receiving a gift, whether we think so or not at the time. | | | | mountains for you in the long term. |
| The challenge is to receive feedback with an open | | | | Now back to putting the zazazoom into my sizzleless |
| mind and learn from it, and disregard our natural instinct | | | | website! |